


Selfish

by icedteainthebag



Category: The X-Files
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-07-26
Updated: 2011-07-26
Packaged: 2017-10-21 19:19:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/228711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icedteainthebag/pseuds/icedteainthebag
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Scully brings her feelings about how Mulder treats her to the forefront.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

At the end of a sweltering July day in the Midwest, the   
land sighs relief with the setting of the sun. Fire spills   
across the horizon and promises the heat will soon   
relinquish to the night.

On days like these, clothes meld to damp skin, trapping the   
heat. Scully opened the dusty car door with a sigh,   
anxiously anticipating the cold blast of air conditioning.   
She slid into her burning hot seat, cringing, and Mulder   
slid in next to her. He eagerly flicked the key in the   
ignition and turned the air on high. They sighed   
simultaneously.

She pulled the sticky strands of hair away from the back of   
her neck.

"So what are you thinking?" Mulder asked, loosening his   
tie.

"I'm thinking...how did I get to the point in my life in   
which my entire professional wardrobe consists of black   
suits?" She adjusted the vent so it blew full on her face.   
"You?"

"That I'd give my left nut for a pair of Bermuda shorts   
right now."

Scully rolled her eyes and smiled, settling back against   
the seat. "Mulder, I never, ever want to see you in a pair   
of Bermuda shorts."

Mulder shed his coat for his dress shirt. "Why don't you   
tell me how you really feel, Scully?"

"Mulder?"

"Yeah?"

"Quit talking and start driving."

He laughed as he pulled on his seatbelt. Best not to push   
it with an exhausted, hot, overdressed Scully who had just   
made the conclusion that they'd dragged their asses out to   
southern Missouri to discover that the unexplained "Lights   
of the Ozarks" activity at dusk was not extraterrestrial.   
In fact it was extremely terrestrial, in the form of a   
massive swarm of lightning bugs in a mating frenzy at an   
unusually high altitude zipping across the sky.

"You win some, you lose some," he had said as she stood   
with her hands on her hips, face to the sky, shaking her   
head. She'd turned her head to observe his sheepish grin   
with an intolerant intensity.

"Sometimes, Mulder..." She'd waved a glowing bug away from   
her face. "I think you get a real kick out of dragging me   
around on your wild...bug chases."

He had gazed up at the swarming bugs and shrugged, full of   
secret satisfaction. He did get a kick out of it. At times,   
he enjoyed the failed cases more than the successes. It   
gave her a chance to be right, more importantly to prove   
him wrong. That rarely happened, in his mind anyway, and   
honestly sometimes this stuff was so outrageous that it   
seemed they, together, were the only sanity left in the   
world.

The unity was indefinably important to him, that they   
could counter each other without end yet still come   
together and enjoy the moment of realization, no matter who   
was right.

Another lightning bug hit Scully's face. With a   
dissatisfied hmph, she'd shaken her head, her auburn hair   
failing over her eyes. He'd viewed her peripherally as she   
pushed it back from her face. It was one of his favorite   
little gestures.

"Are you ready to get out of here?"

"As tempting as it is to stay in this bug-infested, damp,   
sticky, hot excuse for the wonder of nature...yeah."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Scully was splayed out on the lumpy mattress, coils sinking   
into her bare back. Her arms were thrown haphazardly above   
her head as she quizzically examined two houseflies as they   
endlessly beat themselves against the light fixture on the   
ceiling.

That's so us, she mused.

Her body was covered in a sticky film of sweat and dirt.   
Immediately upon entering her less-than-fabulous   
accommodations at the Blue Spruce Lodge, she'd stripped   
down to her bra and panties. She wondered whether there   
just might be a tiny video camera in this room somewhere.   
It was that type of place.

Maybe, she thought as the flies knocked at the light, if we   
would stop running after shadows and sasquatches all the   
time, the Bureau would spring for more fitting   
accommodations. At this point, they continually had the GAO   
breathing down their necks about writing off two nights at   
the luxurious Blue Spruce Lodge and a dinner of meatloaf at   
the Toot Toot Cafe.

She'd watched Mulder wolf down the browned lump of meat   
like it was his last meal on Earth. Six years with this man   
and he always ate the same way. Urgently, like the food was   
about to walk off his plate. She'd listlessly forked at the   
meatloaf, staring at him, wishing she'd ordered the house   
salad. Iceberg lettuce with carrot shreds doused in ranch   
from a three-gallon vat was a bit more appealing than what   
had been placed before her, the plate clattering as it   
announced its glorious arrival.

So she was hungry, and Mulder had taken the car to go check   
out "those crazy lightning bugs and their aerial acrobatic   
show." And he'd stopped asking her to go when all he heard   
was dead silence on the other end of the line.

"Fine, Scully...enjoy your evening at the Spruce."

She turned on her side, wiping the sweat from her brow with   
her upper arm. The "Spruce" did have a small pool, and from   
the looks of it, the water was fairly clean. Clean enough.   
And probably fairly warm from the heat of the day.

She weighed her options. A shower in the clawed tub with   
the screeching shower head. Hungrily, sweatily awaiting a   
pizza delivery while watching the 15" black and white   
television. Waiting for Mulder to return and bitching him   
out for ditching her in a sweltering room with no food or   
water to go explore A Bug's Life, in real life.

Order the pizza, skip the T.V. Go for a swim, wait for the   
pizza. Accept the delivery, start eating, only to be   
interrupted by a bang on the door. Let Mulder in, watch him   
eat most of her pizza, bitch at him for ditching her, and   
sigh when he blames it on her disinterest in the legendary   
lights of the Ozarks.

Sounds like a plan.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Scully's swimsuit was a mainstay in her luggage, though she   
rarely used it. It was kind of a fantastical idea, that one   
of these trips would involve some sort of relaxation in a   
lagoon-like setting.

She slid on the black two-piece, inspecting her body in the   
mirror loosely hung on the wood-paneled wall. She ran her   
hands down the curves of her hips and checked out her   
bottom. She was relieved to find each piece still nicely   
fit. Her eyes were drawn to the tattoo that peeked out from   
behind her back. She softly smiled at the simple pleasure   
it gave her when she remembered it was there.

She knew Mulder was, or had been, wildly curious about what   
it was, where it was, what it meant. All he know was that   
it was there, somewhere on her body. A little shiver ran   
down her spine as she imagined him looking for it, eyes   
hungrily raking over her tense skin. Her fingers traced the   
hollow of her belly button as a reflection of curiosity   
burned back from the mirror.

She pulled out of her fantasy moment and grabbed a towel.

Scully padded barefoot along the cool, rough sidewalk. The   
darkness was perforated by yellow lamps that led to the   
dimly lit pool area. She'd wrapped her towel tightly around   
her body to disguise herself from any weirdoes that might   
be lurking. Sighing deeply, she pushed the gate open and   
reached the edge of the pool. Dipping her toes in, she was   
comforted to find it lukewarm.

She tossed her towel to the patio table and slipped into   
the dark water just as quickly. Her body immediately   
thanked her as she pulled her head under. It was pure,   
simplistic bliss, something she hadn't let herself   
experience in an embarrassingly long time.

She emerged with a gasp for air, treading water and   
scanning the enclosure for any signs of ill will. Finding   
none, she turned onto her back, pushing off against the   
side. Millions of blinking stars welcomed her sight. She   
heard her slow breaths in, out, as water filled her ears.

Somewhere up there are answers. Somewhere beyond the   
clouds, the jets, the stifling atmosphere. But what were   
they? Where would they lead?

Always to more questions.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

After the mild disappointment of learning that lightning   
bugs en masse only truly exist for that hour or so of   
twilight between sundown and darkness, Mulder drove through   
Sonic to get himself a strawberry limeade and a   
cheeseburger with mustard. When asked if he wanted anything   
else, he thought of his partner, probably anxiously   
awaiting his arrival so she could bitch at him about how   
hungry she was since he took the car to go investigate the   
lights phenomenon.

He ordered another cheeseburger and gave a bit of thought   
to how Scully would take her drink. He ordered her a cherry   
limeade, knowing the seeds from the strawberries would   
probably disturb her in some deep way.

In fact, he thought after he ordered, she would have   
probably preferred some kind of salad. But he didn't even   
know if Sonic had salads.

"Do you have salads?" He asked when he arrived at the   
drive-thru window. The teenage girl attending the space   
gave him the most irritated expression he'd seen in...at   
least a few hours.

"Yeah. They're on the menu."

"Well..." Mulder faltered, thinking. "I mean, do you have   
some...salad with chicken?"

"Oh, my Lord, yes." Exasperation filled her voice. "Is that   
what you want?"

"Actually...it's for my partner, I think instead of the   
second cheeseburger. Yeah, thanks," he decided. The order   
was changed, paid for, and he was on his way.

He wondered if she would be cool with eating dinner   
together in her room tonight. Most of the time his split-  
second decisions related to some half-assed attempt at   
getting more time with Scully without being horrendously   
obvious as to his intentions.

He liked when they could get real, kick off their shoes,   
and talk about anything other than work. They'd swap   
childhood stories sometimes, like the time he drank a   
bottle of salad dressing for a buck and threw it up   
afterward. Or the time she walked in on her parents and her   
dad was wearing nothing but his captain's hat.

Little moments of reality slowly and surely drew his heart   
toward hers. Now it beat so closely and passionately he   
wasn't sure if it could exist without the gentle prompting   
of her own. To go on, keep moving, keep existing. At times,   
to keep dreaming.

Mulder knocked on her room door, his hand clutching two   
paper bags. The light in her room was off and for a split   
second, he wondered if she'd called a cab to the airport.   
He turned the doorknob and it popped open. Yellow light   
filtered in from the doorway.

"Scully?" he murmured, glancing around. His eyes adjusted   
to an empty made bed, her phone on the bedside table, and   
her bag in the corner of the room. He set the food down on   
the table and pursed his lips, trying not to let the little   
panic alarm set off in his head.

A hungry Scully may have left the door unlocked to make a   
quick pass at the vending area past the pool. Her affinity   
was toward Cheez-Its and Diet Pepsi when she was desperate,   
preferably Diet Wild Cherry Pepsi when available. He shut   
her door and wandered along the outdoor corridor.

His eyes were drawn to the pool, cast in dim yellow   
lighting, as he thought how fantastic it would feel to dive   
in and wash the day's sticky dirty heat away. Someone   
apparently already had that idea and was floating across   
the water on her back. Mulder wandered closer, taking a   
quick scope of the lean torso and black-clad breasts that   
peeked over the top of the water.

And then he realized who it was.

His jaw dropped a bit before he quickly corrected it. How   
completely uncharacteristic of Scully to lounge in the   
pool. Or maybe it was characteristic of her, and he just   
didn't know her well enough to realize it. The thought   
troubled him. She was oblivious to her surroundings, her   
guard let down. He ached to know what crossed her mind as   
she soaked in serenity.

Mulder pushed open the gate to the pool area, relieved by   
its silent swing. He slowly stepped over to a lounge chair,   
his eyes focused on every bit of her he could see. He felt   
like he was capturing a glimpse of some wild animal in its   
natural habitat.

He sat down with his elbows on his knees, watching, waiting   
for her perception to pick up his presence. Her fingers   
delicately threaded through the water. She scooped up a   
palmful and poured it onto her stomach. Shallow breath,   
gentle movements. His eyebrows spiked and suddenly he felt   
embarrassed for intruding on such a personal moment.

As if on cue, Scully's eyes opened and darted to him. Her   
body disappeared underwater. "Jesus, Mulder."

"I'm sorry," he managed, a blush flooding his cheeks.   
Settle down, he thought. It's not like she was touching   
herself or anything. Okay...don't go there.

"Well..." She treaded water, staring at him. "It's all   
right. You just surprised me."

"How's the water?"

"Wonderful."

"How wonderful?" He kicked off one shoe, then the other.   
Scully looked confused.

"Really wonderful," she conceded, her eyes meeting his.

"Well then...make room for Mulder. I'm coming in." He   
pulled his shirt over his head. Scully averted her eyes   
away from his muscular chest and stomach, then let them   
sweep back over his body as he bent to pull his socks off.

"Mulder...you...I was getting out soon. I'm starving."   
Words tumbled out of her mouth and her tongue tripped over   
them. He met her eyes with a half-smile and unbuttoned his   
pants. He stopped and raised his eyebrows at her.

"Scully, do you mind?"

Speechless, she turned her back to him and rolled her eyes   
with a deep breath. She heard him shed his pants. Silence,   
and then the water shifted as he slid into its warmth.

"Can I turn around yet?"

"Up to you."

She found him hopping up and down in the water. His head   
slipped under and her brow furrowed as she tried to figure   
out his location. An avid swimmer, he moved like a shark in   
the water. Swiftly, silently and with purpose.

He popped up near the middle of the pool about ten feet   
away. "Ohhh yeah. Scully, that is sooo good."

She did her best to ignore the huskiness of his voice. His   
motivations for joining her in the pool were puzzling, and   
it was best not to overthink them.

Right.

"So did you find any bugs?" she asked, swirling her hands   
in the water.

Mulder did the same, watching the little waves he created.   
"Actually, and I'll pretend that you actually are   
interested, no. It was pretty disappointing."

Her eyes wandered over his shoulders as she kept her   
distance, treading water with slow, powerful strokes.   
"That's a big surprise."

"What?"

"Disappointment."

He made a funny face. "What do you mean?"

"When was the last time you were actually satisfied with a   
conclusion, Mulder? I know I'm having a hard time   
remembering it myself." She watched as his expression   
morphed from confusion to one of self-righteous   
indignation. She felt like pushing his buttons tonight. It   
served him right.

"What's with all this pent up anger, Scully? Last time I   
checked we were just out here enjoying a swim."

"Well, there are some things that need to be said and maybe   
I'm in the mood to address them," she countered. He   
studiously watched her rant. "Like tonight. I'm so hungry,   
Mulder, I could actually eat that meatloaf you so   
unceremoniously wolfed down earlier."

"Ummm...maybe I should get out," he said, hurt evident in   
his voice.

"You know...don't go running off on me just yet," she said.   
His eyes darkened. "I'm tired of you leaving me behind.   
Just because I didn't want to go watch those...stupid   
bugs." She pushed herself a little closer to him to better   
see his face. "Maybe for a change, if you want to do   
something, and I say I don't want to do it, instead of   
ditching me as always, a simple 'Well, what would you like   
to do?' may be in order?"

His mouth dropped open slightly. "Jesus Scully, I really   
don't feel like I deserve this."

They stared at each other across the trembling water.

"Welcome to my world," she finally shot back. "Not   
everything is about you. I thought we went over this   
before."

"Scully...stop."

She was panting slightly in her passionate attempt at   
making him realize the hurt she felt, the same she'd felt   
enough times before.

"Whatever...Mulder...you just don't get it." She turned and   
swam toward the pool wall. It was time to get out, go get   
the pizza, and have it all to her damn self.

Scully slowly pulled herself up out of the water. Her   
thighs had barely emerged when she felt his hands on her   
calves, yanking her back down into the water. She gasped   
and caught herself on the edge. His hands slid up her   
thighs and her hips to her sides, steadying her. She   
angrily glanced over her shoulder.

"Mulder, I..."

"You need to stop and listen to me," he demanded, his voice   
low. Her breath caught in her throat as his fingers   
tightened along her waist. His chest was inches away from   
her back, radiating heat. He pushed his lips against her   
ear and his words emanated as a low growl.

"Despite what you may think, I have never...ever...taken   
you for granted. I do not operate solely on the basis of my   
needs. In fact, I think I've been fairly reasonable about   
ignoring some of my needs for an extremely long time now."

He felt her stiffen under the hot tone of his voice. He   
held her, thumbs rubbing into her lower back. Breathless,   
she was without words for a moment, which passed quickly.

"What...needs?" Scully asked hesitantly. She felt her   
heartbeat speed up as he breathed out against her neck in a   
sigh.

"You," he finally murmured. "You...all of you...all the   
time, Scully. All the time."

She tried to turn around but he pushed his body against her   
back. He bit back a moan at the sensation of her smooth,   
wet skin against his chest. The hardness in his boxers   
pressed against her bottom and she made a tiny sound,   
pushing back against him. She wasn't sure if she was   
fighting or giving in.

Mulder snaked an arm under her own, offering support, while   
his other hand slid down her hip to grip her thigh. Scully   
quickly grabbed his wrist.

"Hold on, Mulder," she whispered faintly, the erection   
against her bottom causing a hot meltdown between her legs.

"You don't want me to hold on." Fingers traced her inner   
thigh. She closed her eyes and gritted her teeth, feeling   
every moist breath on the back of her ear. "You don't want   
me to stop at all, do you?"

She sagged into his arms as he traced the juncture of her   
inner thigh and pelvic bone. Her fingers loosened around   
his wrist. Her body was throbbing and aching, telling her   
what she wanted and trying to convince her intellect and   
common sense to sit this one out.

"Tell me," he growled.

"What?" she whispered.

"Tell me not to stop."

She paused as his fingers pulled at the fabric of her   
bikini bottom. "Don't..." A gasp as they inched under   
gently. "...stop."

His hand slid down the front of the clinging fabric,   
cupping her roughly. She bucked against him with all of her   
might, struggling in the tight space between his body and   
the wall. His hand kneaded her, pulling her harder against   
his groin. She could feel him pulsing behind her.

"You can call me selfish all you want, Scully. I'm being   
selfish right now."

"Oh god," she whispered. Mulder could feel how hot and damp   
she was against his strong fingers, bringing him to a new   
height of arousal. He began to part her folds slowly,   
stroking and nudging his way in. Her panting became ragged.

"How about now?" He continued quietly. "Selfishly exploring   
you...not even asking what you want."

His fingers dragged through her wetness, circling around   
her clit slowly and firmly. She shamelessly ground herself   
back against him, hanging on every word. Mulder pressed   
into her, his mind growing wild as he imagined how she   
would taste, how it would match her scent perfectly.

"And now...I'm going to slide my fingers inside you..." She   
groaned loudly at the thought. He hesitated just before her   
opening, desperately trying to take his time. "Because   
I..." He pushed two fingers deep inside of her and she   
rolled her head back on his shoulder with a moan. "I want   
it."

The sensation of his thick fingers buried into her and his   
palm grinding against her clit nearly drove her over the   
edge. She turned her face into his neck and watched as he   
bit his lip, slowly sliding his fingers in and out. Her   
hips began to roll against his movements.

"If you want to go along with me on this one,   
Scully...that'd be great...or...I could ask you what you'd   
like to do for a change," he whispered.

Her eyelids fluttered closed. She opened her mouth to   
speak.

"I'm sorry sir...ma'am...the pool area is closed. Hours are   
from nine to nine."

Mulder was off of her so quickly that her head nearly   
slipped underwater. Her eyes snapped open to the employee   
at the gate. They both stared wordlessly at him as he   
stood, unmoving.

Finally Mulder spoke. "So, are you waiting for us to..."

The employee nodded. Scully closed her eyes and exhaled a   
deeply held breath. She pulled herself out of the water,   
legs shaking. Mulder let out an exasperated sigh before he   
swam to the other end of the pool. He made no attempt at   
hiding the arousal pushing up against the wet fabric of his   
boxers when he emerged.

"Karma, my friend," he snapped at the employee. Scully   
pulled the towel around her shoulders, uncomfortably   
exposed. He grabbed his clothes and shoes and waited for   
her to exit the gate.

They walked alongside each other silently until they   
reached their room doors. A cricket chirped as they met   
each others' eyes. Mulder smiled softly at her.

"Not here," he said, searching her gaze.

"Not here," she repeated faintly, looking down. She opened   
her room door. "Goodnight, Mulder."

He hesitated for a moment and then nodded. "Scully."

She closed the door behind her and melted against it. Her   
phone on the bedside table flashed with a message. Mind   
cloudly with arousal, she picked it up.

"Hi, Miss Scully, we tried to deliver your order but no one   
was there to accept it. Call us back if you'd like us to   
re-deliver it. Thanks."

Scully rolled her head on her shoulders and flicked on the   
lamp. She immediately saw two Sonic bags and two large   
drinks sweating on her room table.

She sat down slowly, opening the bags. She ate it all and   
drank the cherry limeade.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens after Scully brings her feelings about how Mulder treats her to the forefront.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thanks to D.K. and cellodog for the support and kind words. Thanks to everyone who liked Part 1 and patiently waited for Part 2 to happen! M & S thank you too.

Scully resisted the arrival of morning. The sun pushed   
through the thin drapes of the motel room like a guest that   
had arrived two hours early. Despite the sweltering evening   
past, it was damp and cool now, like it had rained.

She dragged her eyes open and slowly focused on the dust   
dancing in the filtered sunlight. The leftover Sonic trash   
was scattered on the table, her swimsuit tossed over a   
chair. She felt like she'd been on a bender without   
drinking, hungover from the intensity of the pool situation   
last night. A deep sigh escaped her lips as she snapped her   
eyes back shut.

She was intolerant of the ache that pulled deep inside of   
her at the first thought of his fingers all over. She'd   
even taken the liberty to relieve her frustration last   
night, thinking of his hot breath on her skin as she made   
herself come, moaning his name. It always felt good, but   
this time it left her emptier inside than usual. And now it   
was back, the desperate twinge of arousal in the back of   
her mind, frustratingly real.

She thought about last night's endless tirade against   
Mulder. Impressed with her bluntness, she was surprised at   
how hurt she actually had felt about his actions. She'd   
developed an expert ability to bury her feelings deep   
inside, any feelings of anxiety, sadness, frustration,   
love. Anything that might send her off her set path, make   
her seem vulnerable. Growing up around the boys had sparked   
this survival mechanism and as an adult, it became useful,   
even essential at times in her career and personal life.

Letting it out to Mulder was like deflating a balloon about   
to burst. Once she started, there'd been nearly no way to   
stop. But he'd found a way to stop her when she pushed him   
too far.

She knew his motivations for so passionately pursuing   
everything, like a hurricane blindly bouncing along its   
course. Even though they'd been together for several years,   
his patterns of behavior developed early and strengthened   
with each challenge or failure.

In that, they were the same.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Mulder woke up with a calf cramp that radiated from his   
left ankle to his knee. He cringed and tenderly stretched   
his toes, his bare leg throbbing. The ancient motel bed   
creaked its complaints under the weight of his body. He   
cursed back at it and sat up at the side of the bed, his   
back aching.

After he'd left her at her door last night, he'd entered   
his room, shut the door and realized Scully had his evening   
snack. His first inclination was to go over and retrieve   
it. Instantly he'd remembered that going over there was   
probably not the greatest idea right now. He wouldn't be   
able to stop himself from what had suddenly seemed   
inevitable. And he was not going to make love to her to the   
soundtrack of a groaning mattress older than either of them   
for everyone within two city blocks to hear.

The thought of it made his mind race to how it felt to push   
against her in the pool, desperate for her to understand   
his response to her anger. His groin started throbbing as   
his body recalled her wet skin, really hot, wet, swollen...

He stood up from the side of the bed and roughly ran a hand   
through his hair. He felt filthy; when he hungrily realized   
Scully had his food and all he'd wanted to do was go next   
door and push himself into her, he'd gone on a run instead.   
He'd run in the darkness, as fast as he could for as long   
as his body allowed.

The humid air had pulled sweat from places he didn't even   
know sweated. He often ran when his anxiety overcame him.   
It pushed everything out and away. It left him with   
simplicity: Hot. Sore. Drained.

He'd arrived back at the motel and swiped junk food from   
the vending machine. As soon as he'd passed her room his   
tired body got all excited again. Exhausted, he'd given in   
to himself, throwing his clothes in a damp pile on the   
floor. He stroked himself, imagining his fingers deep   
inside of her. It took him longer than usual to finish.

Mulder wandered into the shower and turned on a hot blast   
of water. Her comments had bothered him last night. It   
bothered him that she thought he only acted for himself. It   
bothered him that more times than not, she might be right.   
But he'd always assumed she enjoyed the spontaneity of his   
actions. Maybe not all the time, but at least sometimes.   
Instead she'd felt neglected, left behind, pulled along.   
Was she tired of being the only one he wanted to be around?   
He wondered if it was selfish of him to put that pressure   
on her. The only one. But he didn't want it any other way.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

In the car they munched on stale donuts from the gas   
station on the way to the airport. Mulder had been trying   
to keep his gaze from lingering too long on her as he   
drove. She was deeply immersed in The Seven Habits of   
Highly Effective People, which indicated to him that she   
was completely avoiding any eye contact or conversation.   
Because he'd read that book and knew for a fact that she   
could have written it herself.

"So..." He drummed his fingers against the steering wheel.   
"How do you see it?"

Her eyes didn't leave the page. "How do I see what,   
Mulder?"

It was amusing how she always challenged him to elaborate,   
even when she knew what he meant. "How do you see   
us...together, like that?"

She dog-eared the page and closed her book. "Together,   
like...together, together?"

"Yes, Scully. In the carnal sense."

"Huh."

Scully remained quiet for a few minutes but he wasn't   
alarmed at her silence. She most likely had an elaborate   
sense, down to every last detail, of how "it" should be. It   
takes awhile to draw from that deep a well.

"Well, Mulder...in the many scenarios that have played   
through my mind..." She shot him a warning look to keep him   
quiet. "Overall, the essence of these scenarios is always   
the respect and partnership we've had over the years," she   
finally finished with a shrug.

"So no furry handcuffs or bullwhips?"

An exasperated sigh preceded her unstoppable smile. She   
stretched her legs. "Why don't you tell me how you see it."

"Well...I see a fantastic hotel room. We'd have to pay for   
it ourselves because it's not the kind we can put on the   
Bureau card. A rose petal bath for you, some deliciously   
economical champagne. I'm as innocent as I always am,   
completely in awe of your presence and that you picked me,   
obnoxious and...self-righteous me. And for that, and for   
every next touch and breath, I'm increasingly grateful for   
you in my life."

She blushed, pushing at the floormat with her toes. "That's   
beautiful."

"That's what it is," he said simply.

They rode in silence to the car rental return.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Mulder pulled their bags along the glassy brown tile of the   
airport, pacing himself per usual, remembering his   
advantage of flat shoes and six inches' height compared to   
his partner. Whenever they strolled through an airport, no   
matter where they were, the pair attracted curious looks.

He'd begun to give credit to her stunning beauty and   
straightforward, unassuming stride as she kept up with this   
mildly attractive, lanky guy in a suit who always   
accompanied her. He took pride in the fact that he was that   
guy, that the looks he received from men were borderline   
jealous. What was she doing with him?

Hell if he knew.

He lightly touched her back at the baggage check, directing   
her ahead of him. His fingers strayed on the dark sheen of   
her jacket a few sweet seconds more than usual. She noticed   
as quickly as he did, but made no gesture to acknowledge   
it.

They talked of returning to the office, how the severity of   
the reaming they'd get from Skinner for their pointless   
mission would depend on if he'd gotten laid the night   
before. And then she paused, deep in some intrinsic,   
analytical thought. He watched her closely, waiting for the   
thought to emerge.

"What if it doesn't work?" Scully finally asked. He looked   
down at her and laughed softly as they moved forward.

"It'll work."

"Mulder. How can you be so sure?"

"Because..." He put his hand on her arm. "In this I   
believe, Scully. More than anything."

She believed him.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Two flights, a layover and two crappy chain store subs   
later, they were back in Virginia. The time difference had   
set them back into the evening, which Scully reveled in. It   
was cool, familiar and comfortingly devoid of insects.

She did her best to avoid the underlying tension between   
them as they drove home in his car. It had begun as an   
inkling of wanting in the morning, and like a slow-  
spreading wildfire, had consumed her thoughts more with   
every hour. She was amazed and slightly annoyed at how   
fear, dread, anticipation and excitement could feel all too   
similar mixed up in her stomach.

He drove up the road to her apartment building and double-  
parked to let her out. She looked at him and felt her body   
gently quiver as he returned her gaze.

"Do you want to come up?" The words spilled out quickly and   
she nearly cringed. She took a deep breath to steady   
herself.

"Do you have to ask?"

She turned her head away to softly smile.

"I'm going to have to park. That might take an hour or so."

Her smile broadened slightly. "Don't worry. I'll wait."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Scully had too much time on her hands for this very moment.   
Upon entering her apartment she searched for anything that   
was out of place. Clothes, dishes, movies. But there was   
nothing to fix. Customarily she'd cleaned before heading   
out on their trip.

She wondered if she should change clothes, but didn't want   
to make anything too obvious. Maybe just change her bra and   
panties. Or maybe she shouldn't.

"Fuck," she sighed as she plopped down on the couch, her   
head in her hands. Every few seconds her mind flashed like   
lightning back to the pool, his breath, his fingers, his   
words. Every time, a hot rush flooded her body.

She was intimidated by his effect on her. She'd felt it   
before at times, when hugging or kissing each others'   
faces, hands, everywhere but where it mattered most. But   
this was so much more intense. And waiting, knowing they   
were rushing toward that moment and wouldn't stop this   
time, was making her crazy.

A tap on the door startled her from her obsessive thoughts.   
Mulder entered after his warning knock, dragging her   
suitcase behind him. "You forgot something."

"Sorry," she said as he clicked the door shut. "Where did   
you park?"

"I'm not really sure," he admitted. "I found a space and   
got back here as soon as I could."

The two shared a slight, nervous laugh. Mulder   
uncomfortably shifted his legs, resting the luggage by the   
door. He wasn't sure where to go or what to do. It was like   
he'd abandoned all of his prowess back in Missouri. All   
that was left was an aroused, nervous, extremely hopeful   
boy.

"I'm sorry. I should at least take your coat," Scully said   
quickly, pushing up off the couch.

"What a hostess," he mused as she walked up to him. "You've   
never taken my coat before, Scully."

Their eyes met and she pulled the coat from his hand. She   
stood in front of him, the look in her eyes morphing into   
deep sincerity. Her teeth gritted together slowly as she   
studied the lines of his face, wanting to work herself into   
his mind and read his thoughts.

The coat slipped onto the floor when she grabbed the back   
of Mulder's head and pulled his face to her own. Her   
fingers threaded through his hair in the split seconds of   
hot breath between their lips. Her mouth pressed hungrily   
against his. Immediately he was open to her, pulling her   
deeper as she pushed him up against the door with her body.

He growled low in his throat as her stomach pressed against   
him, rubbing his growing hardness. He slid his hands up her   
back and down again, memorizing the slight curves of her   
muscles.

They parted lips to take ragged, short breaths. "Where..."   
Scully gasped before he captured her mouth again.   
"MmmmMulder...Where..." His lips moved to her neck and she   
pushed up against him with a moan. "Ohgod...Go   
there...now."

He knew exactly what she meant as he nibbled her ear. She   
hissed out a low breath. "I don't want to stop touching   
you, Dana," he murmured against her neck.

His voice saying her name, so different from before, echoed   
through her head in new and unexplainable ways. She passed   
her hand down his arm to twine their fingers together,   
pulling away from him with a gentle smile that made his   
heart skip a beat. She'd smelled softly of a day's worth of   
travel, but mostly of her, something he'd memorized and   
dreamed of again and again.

He couldn't believe they were here, doing that, going   
there. That she was leading him by the hand to her bedroom.   
He sucked in a sharp breath as a dull throb commenced below   
his waist. She was so certain and so strong. He watched her   
flick on the light, revealing her perfectly made bed, the   
down comforter. Little candles on the bedside table. He   
soaked in every detail before he noticed Scully staring at   
him.

He sheepishly met her eyes as they stood, hand in hand, at   
the foot of her bed. She sighed.

"We should start kissing again," she recommended, her eyes   
searching his.

"That seemed to work pretty well," he replied, his thumb   
stroking hers. She glanced down at the front of his pants   
quickly and raised her eyebrows. It made him shudder.

"Okay, Miss Scully," he said, leading her to the side of   
the bed. He sat down and she stood in front of him, her   
lips parted slightly as she examined the expression on his   
face. "You can't look at me like that without expecting   
some sort of reaction."

Another smile. He was addicted to the lift of her lips.   
"Apparently, it already has caused some sort of...reaction,   
Mulder."

He laughed softly, averted his eyes and quickly grabbed her   
waist, lying back to pull her on top of him. She let out a   
small squeal as her body dropped to him. Her hands resting   
on either side of his face, she slowly lowered herself to   
lie flat against his chest. Their foreheads met and she   
grinned. Mulder took the opportunity to slip his hands over   
her bottom and lightly squeeze it.

Her hips pushed against him as she gasped and claimed his   
lips in another kiss. Their hips began pushing together,   
gently at first, a subtle introduction.

Scully straddled him, lifting up and pulling off her shirt   
in one smooth motion. She tossed her hair as his eyes   
wandered her body, tracing a few fingers over the hot skin   
of her stomach.

She watched his expression of barely hidden desperation   
with a sense of aroused accomplishment. She wondered in her   
ability to bring him to his knees. He'd beg if she let him.   
Then again, he could have her begging too if he played it   
right.

"I want the rest of it off," he whispered. The strength   
she'd just held so tightly slipped away. She unfastened her   
bra and left it for him to slide off of her shoulders. He   
delicately lifted the straps and pulled them down. Closing   
her eyes, she felt the cool air against her anxiously   
peaked breasts.

"Scully. Open your eyes."

He kept her stare for a long moment, as if asking   
permission to look down. His gaze drifted and his hands   
quickly followed. She shifted against the hardness pressed   
between her legs, her breath catching as he explored her,   
teasing with his fingers.

"You're so beautiful," he said, fingertips playing on her   
skin, his eyes dark with desire.

"Mulder, you're..." She rolled off of him onto the bed. He   
sat up, tracing a finger down her jaw. "Your turn," she   
said with an arch of an eyebrow.

He removed his shirt and carelessly tossed it aside. She   
placed a hand above his waist. Feeling the warm skin sent   
yet another rush through her body.

He tucked her hair behind an ear. "Why didn't we ever do   
this before?"

"Well, I was afraid."

"Of?" He smoothed her hair along her head and neck,   
delighting in the silk wrapped around his fingers.

"Of what might happen. Because Mulder, once we cross this   
line, I mean, excuse the cliche but there really has been a   
line. Once we go there, here...I'm never going to want to   
be away from you again."

"I know," he whispered as he traced her lips. She saw a   
flicker of sadness cross his face. Then he gave her a   
slight smile. "I don't want to lose you either."

Scully swallowed the persistent lump in her throat. She   
stood up and unbuttoned her jeans, pulling them down her   
legs. He watched her, his breath quickening. Her expression   
was thoughtful, debating if she should really keep going   
any further.

"I'm not going to stop you," Mulder murmured, leaning back   
on his arms.

She pushed the black silk down her legs and stepped out of   
it. Their eyes locked, unmoving. Long moments passed before   
he allowed himself to slowly take in the vision of her   
body, a picture not unlike the one he'd had for years. He   
stood up and slowly shed his pants and boxers.

Standing in front of each other, like hundreds of times   
before, inches away, eyes locked again.

"I'm afraid to look," she whispered. Her lip trembled.

"Don't look," he whispered back. "Touch."

Scully reached out to trace his neck, to push her palm down   
his chest. She circled his belly button with light fingers.   
She felt her muscles tighten against the ache inside of   
her. Sliding her hand down over him, she held him firmly.   
His response was immediate, flexing hips, a gaping gasp.   
She took in every movement of his body, squeezing and   
pulling at him.

"Uh, yeah," Mulder moaned. "You...can I...touch you?"

Eyes shut, she found his hand and placed it on her lower   
stomach. His fingers traced soft lines, circling her skin.   
Up around her hip and her side. His hand wandered to her   
lower back and began to circle her tattoo. She blushed,   
realizing he'd discovered its hidden location, probably at   
the pool. He hadn't said a thing to her about it.

"It's perfect for you," he whispered, his other hand   
pushing through her hair again. She turned her face to kiss   
his palm. "Can I look at it?"

She nodded, loosening her grip on him. As she turned   
around, her toes nervously twiddled against the softly   
piled carpet.

Mulder crouched down at her bare back, silently studying   
the slender, colorful snake consuming itself. He knew   
textbook what it represented but wondered if it meant   
anything more to her. He'd hurt a little, at times a lot,   
when she was so distant at the time she had it done. He   
wanted to discover her thoughts but had no key to the   
vault. It drove him nuts, so he'd hidden his hurt with   
sarcastic below-the-belt punches. She'd put him in his   
place. She always did.

He ran his fingers around it now, making Scully gasp. He   
pressed his mouth against it, one hand cupping her bottom   
and squeezing. Kissing it, he looked up her quivering back,   
freckled with goose bumps.

"How much do you hide from me?" he murmured against her   
skin. Her hands played limply at her hips.

"You can't know everything."

Mulder kissed his way up her spine as he rose, sliding his   
arms around her waist. She settled against him, on fire as   
their bare bodies nudged together for the first time. "I   
want to know it all," he said, his lips on the top of her   
head. He held her closely, felt her deep sigh.

"I'll show you what I can," she replied softly, turning to   
face him. She stared into his eyes, questioning, biting her   
lip. He took her face in his hands and kissed her deeply,   
eliciting a whimper from her throat. Delicate fingers   
twined around his neck. Scully pressed against him as hard   
as she could.

He tucked his hands around her bottom, picking her up. Her   
legs swung around his hips and they broke their kiss to   
gasp at the hot, pressing center between them. Mulder   
clenched his jaw and resisted the urge to push her down and   
enter her deeply. He was so needy to reach her but knew he   
should wait.

"You can," she whispered, capturing his lips.

"Not...yet," he murmured back, gently placing her on the   
bed. He slid next to her, pushing his hand between her   
legs. Her knees pulled up as she grabbed onto his shoulder.   
He moved his fingers inside her swollen folds and she   
reached for his cock, squeezing him hard, making light work   
of the length of him.

"Oh...Scully. This...it won't last long...you...keep doing   
that," he said between kisses. Achingly slow, their tongues   
teased and battled for position. He lazily traced his   
fingers through her hot flesh. Then he moved over her   
gently and she pressed her breasts against his chest. He   
breathed against her lips and she pulled away, running   
fingers up his body as she got on her knees.

"Lie down," she demanded, her voice low.

He examined her dark eyes as he did what he was told. His   
mind was racing in disbelief, not sure if he should hide or   
shout to the heavens in relief.

She knelt over him and took him in her mouth, quickly and   
fully. His eyes rolled as his body shook at the hot liquid   
texture of her mouth. She wasted no time, urgency   
surpassing patience at last. Sliding, sucking and teasing   
him, rising with the involuntary thrusts of his hips.

He grabbed her bottom with one hand and pulled it toward   
his mouth. She resisted with a whimper. "Please," he begged   
softly. "Please, Scully, please?"

She lifted her head to gasp, his words tremoring through   
her. She gently straddled him over his mouth and he dug his   
fingers into her thighs. "Good girl...now come to me," he   
whispered.

Her mouth hung open with the first push of his tongue   
through her wetness as it throbbed deeply. She licked him   
with a broad sweep of her tongue, tasting him but losing   
herself in his increasingly intense exploration. She sucked   
him in hard when his tongue forcefully rubbed the sensitive   
center of her excitement. She felt herself dripping and he   
lapped it up before returning to that little spot. As he   
flicked and sucked, she started to come, moaning against   
his tight flesh in her mouth.

Suddenly he pushed her away. "Jesus...what..." she hissed,   
her body tingling at the edge of climax.

"I want to be in you when you come," he said, sitting up on   
the bed. "I need to be."

"Ah," was all she could manage. She sat up and he kissed   
her, sharing her taste. She lost herself, her body   
amazingly and entirely giving in at last.

"How do you want me?" she whispered. His eyes widened and   
he bit his lip. Then he pulled her hand and placed it on   
the headboard. She followed his lead, placing her other   
hand against it with her back to him. She looked over her   
shoulder, watching him, waiting with her thighs spread   
slightly.

"Oh god, Scully." He pulled up behind her, his chest   
grazing her back. "This is too much for me. I don't know if   
I'll make it."

His cock pressed against her bottom and she moaned with   
him. "Please do," she muttered with the last of her breath.

He slid against her flesh, seeking entrance, until she   
tilted her hips and caught him deep inside of her. His hand   
clasped over hers while the other wrapped around her hips   
to massage her. Her tightness writhed around him as he   
slowly slid through her and out, rubbing his fingers in   
circles. She tilted her head so he could kiss her neck,   
lick it, bite it as his thrusts deepened and quickened. He   
wanted to consume her completely.

"You feel so," he groaned, pushing his body against her as   
hard as he could. He left it at that.

Waves began radiating where he was rubbing, where he was   
slipping in and out of her, filling her completely and   
desperately again and again. She grabbed the headboard with   
white-knuckled fingers as she started to come hard, a   
centered implosion that sparked up every inch of her body.   
She whimpered and writhed back against him as he groaned,   
pounding harder.

"Mulder," she gasped. "Mulder, come in me...Muldercomeinme,   
Mulder," she begged breathlessly. He kissed her hard and   
she cried out against his mouth as he thrust forcefully,   
pushing her against the wall as he came with a moan of her   
name. He saw stars burst in the darkness behind his   
eyelids. Scully stars.

Scully collapsed against his strong, sweaty chest. He   
wrapped his arm around her waist. She felt their essence   
dripping between them and she shuddered, deeply primal.   
"Mulder. We're dripping on my pillow," she managed.

He laughed and held her closer. "All that and you're   
worried about your pillow?"

"I'm not worried about anything," she responded. She felt   
his pulse inside of her slowing along with her heartbeat.   
Then he slipped out of her and brought her down on the bed   
beside him. He traced her side with his fingers.

"I don't want you to ever worry about anything," he finally   
murmured.

"That's impossible," she whispered, searching his eyes.

Mulder kissed her softly as if she might break. Their hands   
pushed together, clinging tightly.

He had so many questions to ask her. What do you want? What   
can I do? Do you love me? Her breathing slowed as she   
nuzzled into his shoulder. With every resolution came a   
dozen more questions. It would take time to answer them. He   
would have to accept that.

"Are you going to sleep?" she whispered onto his skin.

"Are you?"

"Mmm. I could." She stretched her legs out, pointing her   
toes.

"Do you want me here? Still?"

Scully pulled her face away from him, her sleepy eyes   
rolling with her smirk. "Get under the covers, Mulder.   
Don't make me tell you twice."

Their bodies separated for as brief of a time as it took to   
slither under her soft sheets. She immediately snuggled up   
against him, her body slippery and worn.

"Scully?" He murmured against her hair.

"Yeah?"

"I think my head's in the wet spot."

She laughed softly. "Mulder?"

"Yeah?"

"Flip the pillow over and put me to sleep."

He did as he was told.


End file.
